Happiness Tips from the Bygone Era of Gone With the Wind

Feb 8, 2012 by admin

Absent in the more prominent overviews of this classic, is the comparison of two families who represent two sets of values in the hopes of finding happiness. The first set is lasting values for the most part centered on other’s happiness and fulfillment. While the second group focuses on self-fulfillment at all costs. From a somewhat biased viewpoint we will discover tips centered on this comparison.

Focus for our propositions comes from four main characters referred to by name or insinuation in this resume. Melanie Hamilton Wilkes appears genteel and physically frail. Her husband Ashley Wilkes looks to be her match and soul mate, not frail, but genteel and loving, with great integrity…a true Southern gentleman.

Scarlett O’Hara Butler, on her third husband, is every bit a “chip off the old block” with her Irish temperament fanned by her immigrant father; her aristocratic pride passed down from her mother. And for the finale, Rhett Butler, a self-made man, the only man who seems to delight in attempting to “tame,” “Miss Sc-ah-lett.” Butler, a charming and manipulative cad, seeks to make a fortune off the misfortunes of others.

Tip #1: Eternal Values
Initially, those values providing enrichment for individuals and their relationships are crucial. To name a couple of these: steadfastly preserving a friendship with kindness in the face of scandal; seeing someone’s need of unconditional love and affection and tenderly offering it. These were qualities consistently displayed by Melanie, our physically frail belle, which Scarlett learned quite late in their relationship mainly through Melanie’s example.

Tip#2: Priorities
As some of the players mature, we learn that lives filled with purpose exude confidence and joy. Indeed, what is most important in each day we have? Is it waking to aromas of freshly brewed coffee and familiar sounds? Or maybe it’s the mowed grass signaling spring, the season of renewal and beginnings that encourage the soul. Whatever the day, the first order of business starts with adoration and gratefulness to the Creator, then prioritizing our schedule.

Making those lists which when completed lend an enormous feeling of accomplishment and relief. But what are your real priorities? Maybe helping a close friend have her baby when her husband can’t be close by, like Scarlett did for Melanie; e.g., maybe letting another person’s priorities become ours.

Tip #3: Lose the Destructive Pride
So many times pigheadedness is destructive pride reincarnated. As we delight ourselves in various things, are we assuming a prideful attitude or one of thankfulness? Someone very dear to me would often remind me to have an attitude of gratitude. And my father was a stalwart example of humility. Working very hard to provide for his little family, he knew he was to work with excellence and, most assuredly, not for his own glory.

Yet Rhett worked hard, but for what purpose, for others to see what finery his house held, no matter that the relationships within were deteriorating at lightning speed. And Scarlett, in her flamboyant pride had no need of anyone except those who were part of her agendas, or so she thought.

Tip #4: Replace Jealousy
Oh, my, how vanity and immodesty go hand in hand with envy! Envy for what others have that apparently you will or can never have, be it a lovely home, or mansion; exquisite clothes, or gowns; an authentic gentleman for a husband; or children playing happily. Amid all their loss, where could Scarlett have found happiness? What do you think should have replaced her jealousy?

The only viable substitutions stem from a deep contentment and delight flowing from that attitude of gratitude. Discovering delight as an action word, we find it assumes these forms: appreciate, relish, enjoy, and savor. There is certainly no room for envy here.

What we have discerned in the pages of Gone with the Wind is that whatever the era, happiness securely rests in selflessness. Lasting fulfillment and true joy overflow into our response to others, whether in work environments, grocery stores, families, or wherever our list of priorities takes us. As we look for opportunities to elevate, encourage, and serve other people, we preserve our happiness. It is never too late to learn this tip; just ask Scarlett.

 

When she’s not watching classic movies or curled up with a good book, Terry Ford remains in-demand as a writer by keeping her topics varied and always using the world’s best grammar checker.